Psychological Flexibility: The Key to Growth and Adaptation
What is psychological flexibility?
These days a lot of the world is talking about something psychological or mental flexibility. In my mind, flexibility only meant physical and psychological flexibility was an alien concept in my head. However, this article is going to take you through understanding the what of psychological flexibility, the why of psychological flexibility, and the how of it. So before we understand psychological flexibility, let's understand what we mean by flexibility. Flexibility in my understanding is the ability to bend or twist something or move something very easily. For an example, someone doing yoga and stretching both their legs can be called as flexibile physically. So stretching is a part of flexibility in body, then stretching in terms of mind is also a part of flexibility. Just like you stretch your body doing physical exercises, stretching your mind will be called as psychological flexibility. However, when I read the definitions of psychological safety outside, it was defined typically in terms of two things, one the ability to stay in the present moment and second is being open to new experiences. Although we all know that this is what psychological flexibility means, we want to be aware about whether we are in the present moment or not. So let's try and understand why is psychological flexibility important. But before that let's also read some quotes on the same.
Quotes:
Psychological flexibility is the ability to be in the present moment with full awareness and openness to our experience. And to take action guided by our own values. Put more simply, it's the ability to, "Be present. Open up. And do what matters". I fee the way this is just simple and very basic. However, at times we tend to forget these very basic things, we are so involved about the world that we tend to forget being in the present and our mind keeps going in the past or in the future at times. However, being in the present moment is very important and doing what's necessary for that time is equally important. We want to be open to new experiences with full awareness not with half-heartedness. There's not much to dissect in this quote as we have had a very similar way to look at it in the previous paragraph.
Whereas someone who's flexible easily accepts that he/she is wrong, seeks diverse perspectives and learns out through curiosity. They understand that the world is ever changing and so should their opinions and understanding of the world. Rather than being rigid to one thought, idea or opinion, the flexible mind tends to seek the unknown, and try and explore the possibility space. So being flexible gives you more opportunities to learn and you would also come across as humble.
I like this quote as well. Psychological flexibility is the ability to adopt to a situation with awareness, openness and focus and to take effective action, guided by our values. We all know that the situation and the world around us keeps changing, I wouldn't label anything to be good or bad, but they keep changing. So when things change we also need to change in the world to adapt to the world around us. If we don't change then we stay behind in time. So the way Russ Harris defines this is to adopt to a situation with awareness, openness and focus and to take effective action, guided by our values.
Why is it important to have psychological flexibility and openness?
1. New experiences, new learnings : This is a very natural way of looking at psychological flexibility. Given that we are present and fully aware to the situation around us, we are more open and are going to have more experiences due to the same. Every new experience will either give us more wisdom and learning or it can give us more entertainment as well. We might not fully understand the benefits of the experience in that moment, but as you continue to live life, you will realise every experience counts. You will start to communicate better after playing a sport for years, you will start to understand people better when you go to debate competitions and you will appreciate the nature more when you go on treks. At the moment when you are doing the treks you wouldn't truly realise the importance of that, but sooner rather than later you will know that each experience has added value to your existence in the world.
2. Growth: Naturally, when you have a flexible mind you are more open to trying things out, seeing mistakes as an opportunity to improve rather than not being flexible about it. You can be curious towards what's the unknown part in the world and explore that more. You can fail and learn from that failure. If you said something you shouldn't have said, you can know what to say and what not to say. The idea becomes more on the exploration rather than just growth that's based on numbers. Think Vasco Da Gama, his idea of growth was to explore and he found India. Since years and years, mankind is always fascinated with the idea of exploration. We have come to a point where we all know the history where mankind has explored different islands and named the islands accordingly. So if it's in our nature to explore and find out, why not keep doing that.
3. Cognitive ability: It's natural that when you explore, I am assuming that your cognitive ability also increases. A flexible mind that's open to new experiences and new thoughts and new ideas will find that the ability to get exposed to a variety of things sharpens your brain. I am sure there's some science to this but that's my understanding.
4. Better communication skills: As in the above points, I said that when you play a game you are improving your communication skills but you don't know. In fact you also improve your problem solving skills, you also improve your cognitive skills while playing a game. Similarly, when you go to different places you will know more about each of the places and this will improve your knowledge and thus your communication skills.
5. Adaptability to change, better survival: Whenever you adapt to the changing world around you, you will naturally be happier and you will be able to survive within the changing world. This is not my theory but Charles Darwin's so no credit should be given to me :D
6. Being present: By definition of psychological flexibility itself, which means to be present around the changing world, you will keep your life in the present rather than the past or the future thus giving you a better a much happier life. I have felt present while I was playing sports, or listening to music. In fact I also feel present when I am listening to someone talking about something. So being present also comes from the psychological flexibility.
How to have psychological flexibility and openness:
The how is always the important question. I am sure there are too many ways of having that, but there are some things that work for me.
1. Quitting social media consumption: I have recognised that most of the reason my mind starts wandering is when I use too much social media and care too much abut what the world is doing rather than focusing on what I need to do and where do I need to improve. I am saying this works for me because I am not a social media content creator or an influencer, but life is different if you are an influencer.
2. Do one thing at time: I have noticed that when we are doing multiple things at a time we are more likely to get into the future or in the past. Sticking to one thing and truly focusing on that one thing is more important at a point in time. For an example, if you are watching a movie and if you have an emotional thought about your friend at the same time you wouldn't be able to enjoy the movie and remember the story of the movie.
3. Creative: Get creative with something, even if it's a recipe that you found that's new try it. Mix up the ingredients while cooking and see what you can cook out of your own mind. Write an article or a blog, like I do to understand the world a bit better and contribute something to the world.
4. Contribution: Whatever you do in life, do it for the material good for sure, but somewhere in your mind make sure that someone is getting benefitted by your efforts. Even if that brings a smile to people's face do it. If your work gives knowledge to the world then do that. If your works provides happiness and entertainment do it.
5. Letting go of control: Once we accept that we can only control certain things in life and there's not much other than that which can be controlled, we start focusing towards the controllables. For example, you cannot control whether you win a particular cricket match or not because it is also dependent on your team, but you can make sure you bat well and bowl well, field to the best of your abilities. That's something in your hand. It's not in your hand that you will be selected for a particular job, but it's in your hand that you prepare your best for the interview. It's not in your hand that you get stuck in traffic while going to work, but it's in your hand to add a time buffer while reaching your office. Similarly, even in relationships, it's not in your hand that you will be able to attract the opposite sex, but it's in your hand that you dress well, speak well and respectfully and listen well. It's in your hand to go to the gym and make the best of your appearance. So we need to recognise that there are certain things in life that we simply can't control however hard we try.
6. Being curious : They say that curiosity is the gateway of openness. Asking questions and wondering why things are the way they are will focus your idea on understanding perspectives without judgements. Whether it’s learning about a new topic, exploring a different hobby, or trying new foods, curiosity keeps life exciting and helps you stay mentally agile.
7. Developing a growth mindset: A growth mindset—believing that abilities and intelligence can be developed—fosters openness to challenges and learning opportunities. When you view mistakes as stepping stones rather than failures, you become more adaptable and willing to take risks.
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