In my opinion, authenticity is all about being real. Whether that's being real with work colleagues, being real with your own self or being real with anyone you meet. It's talking about the good and also talking about the bad. It's understanding that everyone's good points, but also being empathetic with people's bad points. That's what makes one person authentic. Now even in actions one needs to be authentic, if you don't believe in a certain type of action, it's better not to do it. If you don't believe in alcohol, don't drink. If you don't believe in working too hard, don't do it. Do what you believe in, that's being authentic. If you have to say no to alcohol, saying no is authentic. The truth about authenticity is that we feel we should be perfect inorder to be liked, but the reality is we need to be real in order to be liked. No one likes a person who's too perfect. So I am going to go in order of what authenticity looks like in different areas of our life.
A lot of times in life we want the approval of others. We seek validation from people around us and that's why we lose our authenticity. So this wonderful quote, I found on the internet talks about how we trade our authenticity for the approval of others. I mean why in the world would you want to trade authenticity for approval? Remember, authenticity will give you the approval of the right people. People who will like your quirks, weirdness, and goofiness are going to be much more important than people who validate you for not being you are. So just remember this quote, never trade authenticity for anyone's approval.
Sometimes, we try to be too perfect and that takes the humanness out of us. We feel like everything that we do should be top notch, although that's true to a certain extent, but trying to be perfect in everything and not being real and genuine doesn't really help. Being genuine also helps you to identify your own shortcomings, your own strengths and your own opportunities in a real and an authentic way. We all talk about the growth mindset, but are we real about where we need to grow? Where do we need to focus our growth on? If you are not true to yourself is the first step for it all. So be true to yourself and others, don't appear to be perfect, after all genuine and realness will beat perfection all time, anytime.
The problem today is simply our desire to be loved. If we don't worry too much about being loved, we would be free to be our authentic self. That's what Mr. Andre here is saying, "It's better to be hated for what you are than be loved for what you are not". If you like Pizza, fine you like Pizza, and if people hate you for liking Pizza, you can't do anything about it. Personally, there are a lot of times, I say, I like Shahrukh Khan, people say he is buddha, he is this, he is that, but the truth is it's not going to change my opinion of him. I like him not just for acting but what he's taught me in life. He's taught me hardwork, love and also he is so well read and that makes him much more than just a face and a body. He's made me understand that love transcends the boundaries of blood, a face or a body. But I can't keep explaining myself every time I meet a Shahrukh Khan hater. So I would rather be hated for being real, than being loved for being fake.
This is what Simon Sinek has said, "The greatest advantage of being authentic is that it earns you the trust and respect of those around you." Let's dive this thought a bit deeper. Why is it that being authentic earning trust and respect? Being authentic is all about saying what you believe in and then doing what you believe in. Being authentic is saying no, when things are not possible. So when you say, you will do something, authenticity will make sure that you will do it. The gap between saying and doing would be less and that's what authenticity really means. Now other reason people will trust and respect you is because they will relate to your true self, not the fake self, but the real version of you. The version that says things as they are, not good or bad, but just as they are. A version that is not afraid to say that you are afraid of something, a version that's not wanting validation from others, and that version is more respected and trusted.
How to be authentic ?
Now there are multiple things about this, but the first and foremost thing is to forget about validation and seeking reassurances from people. That's the only way, without that nothing is possible.
So all in all be authentic, say what you believe in and do what you believe in and your life will be richer and happier.
Comments
Post a Comment