What are you avoiding?

It’s not usually the case that I watch TV.
At least, it wasn’t.

Somewhere along the way, TV quietly crept back into my life, not as joy, not as rest, but as numbness. I don’t even enjoy it that much. And yet, it consumes time. Time I don’t want to lose anymore.

The truth is, TV gives dopamine, but not fulfilment. And that difference matters.

I didn’t go to the gym today either. Not because I didn’t want to, but because my structure broke. I wasn’t able to leave the cohort early, even though I start earlier than most people. That’s a logistical problem I can solve, but what’s more important is recognising how fragile structure really is. When structure collapses, numbness rushes in to fill the gap.

And numbness is dangerous.

TV Isn’t the Problem, Avoidance Is.

Let me be clear, there’s nothing inherently wrong with watching TV.
Thirty minutes of good content is fine. What’s wrong is using TV to avoid your emotions.

When I watch meaningless content, I’m not resting, I’m escaping. I’m avoiding silence. I’m avoiding discomfort. I’m avoiding myself. And that’s where the danger lies. TV becomes a background noise that dulls pain, ambition, and awareness all at once. You don’t feel bad, but you don’t feel alive either.

That middle state?
That’s numbness.

Phones, The Most Convenient Addiction

Phones are far worse. They are always within reach, requiring no effort and no resistance, just unlock, scroll, and disappear. Instagram once gave me something valuable, social accountability, I was creating, sharing, and building something meaningful, and although I didn’t realize it at the time, that structure mattered. Reddit, on the other hand, is a trap disguised as usefulness, you go there seeking information, and one random post pulls you into a rabbit hole you never intended to enter, thirty minutes gone, attention fractured, mind polluted. That’s the scariest part of modern distractions, they don’t announce themselves as harmful, they feel harmless, until you realize you’ve lost your edge.

Why Numbness Feels Safer Than Growth

Here’s a hard truth,

Most addictions exist to numb hidden pain.

Phone addiction.
Social media addiction.
TV addiction.

They’re not just habits, they’re shields.

Shields against boredom.
Shields against loneliness.
Shields against unresolved sorrow.

But growth demands the opposite.

Growth demands that you feel.

Learning is painful now, but rewarding later.
Working out is uncomfortable now, but empowering later.
Reading requires effort now, but brings clarity later.

Numbness gives relief now, and regret later.

The Forgotten Power of Silence

Silence scares people.

But silence is honest.

When you sit in silence, your mind stops hiding. Your emotions surface. Your priorities clarify. The world speaks, not loudly, but truthfully.

Personally, reading in silence relaxes me deeply.
Working out makes me feel alive.
Challenging myself makes me feel real.

Someone constantly consuming TV or social media might never understand this, and that’s okay. But it doesn’t make the truth less real.

Habits Shape Futures (Quietly)

Our future is hidden inside our habits.

  • How many times did you check your phone today without a reason?

  • How often did you turn on the TV just to avoid thinking?

  • How easily did you give away your attention?

Those answers define you more than your intentions ever will.

You don’t rise to the level of your goals.
You fall to the level of your habits.

Your Number One Enemy Is You

Not your job.
Not your schedule.
Not your circumstances.

You.

Your habits.
Your defaults.
Your unconscious choices.

The moment you stop numbing yourself is the moment your life starts speaking back to you.

And yes, sometimes what it says is uncomfortable.

But discomfort is the price of depth.
And depth is the price of a meaningful life.

Practical Ways to Reduce Phone and TV Numbness

1. Make Numbness Inconvenient

Willpower is weak. Friction is powerful.

  • Keep your phone in another room while working or reading

  • Remove Reddit, Instagram, YouTube from your home screen

  • Log out of apps instead of deleting them, re-login friction matters

If it takes 30 seconds to open an app, you’ll pause and reconsider.

2. Time-Box, Don’t Ban

Complete restriction often backfires.

  • TV only during meals, max 30 minutes

  • Social media once a day, at a fixed time

  • No “random” usage outside the window

This turns consumption into a conscious choice, not a reflex.

3. Replace, Don’t Remove

Your brain needs a substitute.

Instead of:

  • Phone → book within arm’s reach

  • TV → music + stretch

  • Scrolling → short walk or pushups

Removal without replacement creates a vacuum, and numbness rushes back in.

4. Create a Default Evening Routine

Evenings decide your next day.

Example:

  • Leave work

  • Workout immediately

  • Shower + coffee

  • Read 20 minutes

  • Light, intentional TV or silence

When the routine is automatic, discipline becomes unnecessary.

5. Protect Transitions

Most scrolling happens between activities.

  • After work

  • Before sleep

  • After meals

Rule, no phone during transitions. Let boredom exist. That’s where clarity forms.

6. Silence as Training

Silence is uncomfortable because it’s honest.

  • Sit quietly for 5 minutes daily

  • No phone, no music, no input

  • Just observe thoughts without reacting

This builds emotional tolerance, the opposite of numbness.

7. Track One Metric Only

Don’t track everything.

Track:

  • “How many times did I unlock my phone today without intent?”

Awareness alone reduces behavior.

8. Design Your Environment

Your environment always wins.

  • Books visible

  • Phone face down

  • TV remote out of reach

  • Gym clothes ready in advance

Make the right choice the easiest choice.

9. Accept Discomfort as Progress

If it feels slightly uncomfortable, you’re doing it right.

  • Restlessness

  • Boredom

  • Mental noise

These are withdrawal symptoms from numbness, not problems to fix.

10. Weekly Reset Ritual

Once a week, ask:

  • What numbed me this week?

  • What gave me energy?

  • What do I want more of next week?

Adjust, don’t judge.

Final Reminder

You don’t need more motivation.
You need better defaults.

Structure removes decision fatigue.
Silence restores sensitivity.
Discomfort builds depth.

And slowly, numbness loses its grip.

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