thoughts

 Hey there, it's been a while that I spoke to all of you. I have had a hard time leaving the reels content and talking to the real deal out here. I have been a bit too occupied and because of the lack of discipline, I went into the wrong things in life. I somehow have to find a way to control my lust again. It's such a continuous process. Let's again do a 30 day no social media challenge. It's 24th of May today and we want to be doing something until 24th June. There has to be a transformation in our lives and that transformation should be present in all areas of life. I lost a bit of discipline and structure in the last 2 weeks but here we are, we don't need to announce anything to the world but build it back through quite discipline. It's about choosing to be here and in the now, the more I develop myself, the better my life would be. All of my life has to be in self-growth. So now the question becomes how do I overcome lust? What are some intentional ways I can develop that will help me develop a way to love my life and overcome lust? First of all, if you are home, it's a problem. Somehow find a way to sneak out of your territory. There has to be happiness involved in the process and you have to be in a good frame of mind. Then the second thing is about sleeping, sometimes it's tough to sleep. Because during the sleep, lust can develop. How can we overcome that? 

Lapses happen, and you got to get back up again

The truth about lust is that lapses happen. It's going to happen. But if you believe that discipline is the only way to live, and creative process is the only process you can have in order to win against lust, then so be it. You have to keep on creating something at least for one hour. One has to forgive themselves whenever they go into this process of lust. It's going to be really hard to forgive yourself but the way to come back is simple, it's simple in the sense that it's very simple. Don't remove, replace. Replace watching reels with watching some great content from MIT. Replace bad dreams by the act of cleaning. More importantly, tell yourself, it's okay to be bored. Then learn anything that you wish to learn on the internet. Take courses and develop your skills. The way you numb yourself of the discomfort, that teaches you the most about yourself. 

Identify triggers

Personally, I have identified my lust trigger. It's when I am in bed watching reels, or watching any sort of content. I feel that is what brings most of my lust. Sometimes when I am scrolling through good reels, I don't know what happens but at times, I get attracted to the reels that have lust or something negative with them. So one has to understand and identify their triggers. If somehow you are able to identify your triggers, you will know that you should avoid bed until 10 pm. You should avoid watching your phone too much. You should think what can be done to improve your life, you should meditate. Another trigger that I have is holidays. When it's a holiday, it's quite natural that I do not know what to do with my life. I have seen that it happens during holiday's more because I do not quite know what am I supposed to do with life. So the best way to overcome would be to live life during holidays, go on treks, learn, write, read, do anything but make sure that you are not on bad things. So well, it's about identifying those triggers. 

Replacements

Now that you have identified the triggers. First method is to remove the thing that is causing lust. For example, for me the phone and bed. I can remove that trigger by making sure that I do not go with the phone in my bed. Bed is meant for sleeping and sleeping only. Anything other than that, you have to remove and replace. If you are not getting tired after the day, don't sleep, don't sleep until you are tired. Do the physical exercises, move to different places, walk and make sure there's some movement all the day in your life. Work on improving your strength. Work on improving your goals. Work on learning something new. 

Slow everything down

 Sometimes we try to speed everything up. In that speeding up, we make too many mistakes. For example, a hasty painting won't turn out really well, it takes time to understand the colours, it takes time to understand what kind of painting you are trying to make, it takes time to develop the painting itself. When you try to speed up the natural process, you end up doing it twice. So don't haste anything. It takes time, let it take the natural course of its time. You can't have a baby in less than 9 months. Nature does not work that way. So well, slowing things down is important. Breathing deep is important. 

Stay away from stimulation

Sometimes we tend to move way towards the stimulation. For example, you might find a girl attractive who is dancing on instagram, sometimes it's natural. But that to me is lust. The way you tackle lust is the most important thing. If you keep spending too much time on instagram, you won't feel great. But if you spend too much time on non-instagram things, like playing cricket outside, or doing something outside in the real world, life will be better. The more you stay away from stimulation, and the more closer to boredom the better it will be for your life. Building things is boring. Building your body is boring. Reading is boring. Working out is boring. Helping others is boring. So well, you got to somehow find a way to tell yourself that boring is good. Meditating is boring. It is good. 

Help other people

When you remove time from instagram and other lustful things in life, you will see that you have lots and lots of opportunities to help other people. You can develop a YouTube channel about coding. You can go ahead and hike. You can go ahead and help the community be a safer place. You can help someone moving out. You can find other people to be helpful to you as well. The point is that you should help other people and not have any expectations in return. That is what will make your life meaningful. There are chances that you might drown in the shallows as well. But when you drown in the shallows, you will have certain problems that are very big. So while it's easy to drown in the shallows, the work that one must do is deep. There has to be depth involved in everything that we do. So that's all I say, keep doing deep work and keep developing your tolerance to discomfort. 

Tolerance to discomfort

It's easy to say that discomfort is the key to success. But the question is how can one develop a tolerance to discomfort? Is discomfort really good? In my opinion, discomfort is really good. It certainly makes you a better person and makes you a better human being for sure. So well, it's good. The second question is how can we increase the discomfort in our lives? Let's say you have a problem that you cannot meditate. The way to solve this problem is simple, increase your difficulty as you go. Initially, I understand that meditating even for 5 minutes would be hard, but with time, that will become better. 5 minutes will seem normal and then you increase your difficulty to 10 minutes. Then you increase to 15 minutes and so on. That way it will be easier for you to improve your work. Similarly, going to the gym is tough. Go for 10 minutes and just do treadmill, that's it. Very small goal. Then go the next day and do 15 minutes and as you start going regularly, you will find that your tolerance to discomfort has really improved. 

Controllables

I have spoken about this multiple times. But one has to be focused on the controllable and remove the distractions from your life. The more distractions you have the worse it will be for you. So the question is what are your controllable's in life? We have to understand that one of the first and the most important controllable is your mood. Your mood has to be under your control. There is going to be pain and discomfort. But you stick to the process during the time. You don't run away from the pain. You don't say no to the challenge. But you say you know what, I have to face the pain. I have to face the emotion that I am running away from. Sometimes you run away from boredom, sometimes you run away from frustration, sometimes you run away from discomfort, the idea is that you have to be okay with the discomfort and the pain in your life. You should face it, be with it and be okay with it. That's the only path way to growth. Sooner you will realise that the external circumstances of life are not under our control and the only thing that we can control is how we react. You cannot change the direction of the wind, but you can control your sail. So focus on the controllables and let everything else be a part of that.

Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.

If you are learning something, make sure you repeat your routine every single day. For example, one might learn something for once and then leave it. The idea is that there has to be discomfort daily. No day in the world will have to go without discomfort. You have to learn things from MIT opencoursewave or something else. But the more depth and focus is there in your life, the better it is. Focus when it comes to the camera means to blur everything else but your subject. For example, you might have a focus on one particular thing. That is you want to focus and learn physics. The idea is that you keep focusing on the learning. Keep enjoying the learning and make sure you are a part of the learning. The more learning you have, the better it is. When you are close to the tree breathe deep. When you are close to the world, connect well to the world. 

Working hard

What working hard really means to me. I have heard that Srk works hard for 18 hours a day. It's incredible. While I do not know what his routine is, but Srk has built himself since years and years of effort and no one can overcome him within one day. So well, what does work hard mean. Working hard means that you are working throughout the day on something or the other. You are working on the blog, that's working hard. You are helping the universe that's working down. Look at the world around you, everyone in the world has grown through the aspect of working hard. Work hard in your relationships as well. Work hard in your friendships. Work hard in your job. The harder you work, the luckier you get. Moreover, it's important to recognise that it's okay to be bored. It's okay to feel dejected. It's okay to feel you know what, we got to stay during the hard times. It's about navigating the hard times without changing too much. Don't chase success, let success chase you. You have to chase stillness and proactiveness. 

Patience

Another thing that I say about lust is that, when you are away from lust, naturally good things will come to you. Be patient and let good things come towards you. Patience is a beautiful trait. Patience is sexy. Patience is attractive. Patience has depth. Patience builds confidence. Patience builds you. Patience is the only trait that helps you become the person that you are. Patience means working on the problem for a longer period of time. For example, you might be facing a technical problem, one has to have a struggle timer where one tries to solve the problem. It's interesting in the sense, that the more you develop such solutions the better it will be. So be patient. Breathe deep. Shallow breathing is anxious breathing. Deep breathing is thoughtful work. Breathe deeper not once but always. For example, there are going to be different seasons, patience is not choosing waiting but being okay with not getting successful in one day. Patience is not about wanting anything, but when you want nothing, the universe gives you everything. So be patient. The art of giving is important. The art of choosing the right thoughts is equally important. I have a girl sitting next to me and she is writing something interesting. It's about knowing that the written thought has so much power and meaning. Patience is power. Patience is understanding. Patience is knowing that some times things take time, patience is telling that you one day the seed becomes a plant, but what we see is the seed. Patience is wondering that when you water your plant daily, it will one day become a tree. Patience is not thinking about the fruits while watering but just watering. Patience is about a significance of breathing deep. The deeper your breathe, the deeper your thoughts. There's nothing more significant than patience. Let nature take its own course while you are working. Patience is being one with the nature. Sun does not say you know what I have to go and rise tomorrow at 7 am and starts waiting outside anxiously at 4am. It comes out at 7am and that's exactly when it has to come. When the full moon comes every 15 days, the moon does not say the moon is waiting for those 15 days to come, it is beautiful even when the moon is not there. It's slowly becomes zero and then becomes full again. That's the course of nature and it rotates and comes back to the same point it was. That's why one should not rush the process. Let it be a natural pace and let your work evolve with time. Patience is super power

Rain

While I talk about seasons and rain, one has to understand, that it takes a long time for clouds to accumulate water. The water gets evaporated and then comes back down and then the cycle continues. There's so much rain on a particular day because the water was quietly getting collected in the clouds, maybe we never realised but the environment, the sun was doing its work. It was pulling the water from the ground and one day it will pour everything on to you back. So whatever has to come down will go up and vice versa. So that's what rain teaches me. It teaches me to keep working and wait for the water to come down one day. So as I say, it's beautiful to be patient. It's a beautiful trait. That's why I said, patience is not just power, it's super power. It teaches you to be in the present moment, without losing a sight or a vision for the future. So that's why I say, keep doing your work quietly and one day it will evolve to a point that we will pour down happiness to the entire world through our work. 

Deep breathing

I think a lot of our patience is connected to how we breathe. If we breathe deeply, naturally our thought processes would be a lot more stable. We would know how to breathe. You are tensed, your breathe is shallow, you are not tensed, your breathe is deep. One has to inspect their breathe all the time, because to me as someone said, breathing controls your life. There might be multiple books on the topic and when you are breathing deep, you can control your life by controlling your breathe. Novac Djokovic also works a lot on breathing. If you are breathing well, you are living well. That's all I would say, keep a check on your breathe all the time. Make sure your breathe is never shallow. Before speaking check your breathe, before playing check your breathe, you should have multiple moments in life where you have to check your breathe and live through breathing deeply. Why is it that when you hike the view from the top is very beautiful? What is so special about that? It's because you have worked and made efforts in order to reach the top. The view from the top is always beautiful. There's so many things in the world and when you have worked to climb the mountain, what you are saying to the body is that you worked hard for it and you achieved what you had to achieve. The view is beautiful. You are able to enjoy so many things in the world that otherwise you would not have achieved.